Concentrated ethnic female psychologist talking to client

Stop Complaining!

How to get out of victim mentality fast.

Years ago, during a lunch break, sipping Pho with my colleague, I started complaining about my challenging situation.


I was hoping she’d back me up and maybe even find something to complain about as well. Ideally, about the same person. Because that would make me feel a LOT better.

But she wasn’t game. She smiled and nodded while I was telling her all about my predicament and why this person made me feel miserable.

Something interesting happened when she didn’t join in my complaints.

I heard myself complaining, and I got bored listening to myself.

How often have I complained about but never changed my situation? How many people have I told the same story to?

“If I put myself into this, I can get myself back out.” I thought.

That afternoon, I changed things. I walked away from that particular situation and into a different future.

Now, you could call me impulsive, crazy, reckless and that’s probably true.

But what’s also true is that complaining keeps you in a victim mentality. This can be a very comfortable and safe place to be since you can blame others, situations, and circumstances for your misery without having to do anything about it.

The truth is, no matter the circumstances, you do have a choice. Unless you’re incarcerated, you can always choose to leave, confront, or transform any challenge you find yourself in.

As unbelievable as this might sound, there is a solution to be discovered in every challenge. No matter the scope.

If you recognize yourself in my story and you want to ‘vent’ in a productive way to gain clarity of what you want instead so you can start walking towards that, click below and let me know what’s going on. You can also apply here for a chance to coach with me. Either way, I’d love to support you!

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